Ashes in a Cavity, A Repost
by cruelist
Summary: Repost, with Permission, from Artichokie's story. Harry's thought on Hermione's Wedding Day. Rating T to be Safe


Harry's thought at Hermione's wedding

This is a repost of the same story written by Artichokie (visit her section at ffnet). I only imagined if the story happened some 23 years later with certain different characters.. A Thank you very much for Artichokie for giving me permission to modify her story and repost it under my ff login.

Standard disclaimer : All characters belong to JKR and the owner companies..if I were her..H/Hr would surely happen, oh well.. enough with the rambling already...

Plot belong to Artichokie. I'm just modifying...

Oh will be glad if anybody would give a comment. Thank You. Very much...

-  
It was snowy in December, the temperature was simply freezing, but in that particular place, The Burrow yard, the athmosphere was mostly warm with magical lamps hovered in the air, invisible barrier domed above with energy that make every snow fall above the yard just dissipated. Not to mention the spirit inside.  
Tearful smiles were plastered on every face in the crowd. The women, dressed in their most flamboyant attire, dabbed their eyes with pristine, white handkerchiefs as they held onto their closest companion▓s arm. The men, however impressive they looked in their Sunday best, gallantly stood stiffly for even they failed to be unmoved by the scene before them. Some even had a single tear residing in the folds of their eyes, though they would be denying it later when their friends began to tease.

One man, a black-haired man with haunting green eyes, stood just beyond the innermost circle of the group congregating around the edges of the dance floor. He watched the young couple dance pleasantly, a pang of torment prodding his heart. A smile plastered on his lips, yet a watchful eyes might catch that for most of the time his eyes didn't shimmer. His tale was always one of tragic romance; he▓d always have to be the sacrificing hero, but never the victorious commoners. It seemed that fate would always take away people dear to him: his parents, Sirius, Dumbledore, and now... her.

Yes, Ron Weasley had finally managed to get what he▓d been admitted by his jealous actions since their fourth year. Hermione Granger was now his to hold, to love, to cherish until death do them part. And Harry Potter would have to deal with the painful fact. He lost.

No one would know of his pain, though; this day was about the dancing couple and their future of happiness together. Harry Potter would make sure of that. He was rather adept at hiding unnecessary emotions. So good in fact that he was courageous enough to stand beside them and became Ron's best man. Premiere place to experience how your heart forever be shattered into million of pieces, he thought bitterly.

For once, Harry got lost in his thought before he, then, paid his attention back to the happy couple who were now surrounded by well-wishers. They congregated just as the final note of the music died off. The poor couple never even got a chance to catch their breath.

Thinking of it Harry thought that They were almost as opposite as two humans could be, this couple he meant, ≈not only in looks, but also in personality, as well.

She was a brown haired woman with deep chestnut brown eyes. Her skin was as fair as the brilliant morning sun with a light sprinkling of little freckles along the bridge of her nose. Her cheeks were tinted pink from the exertion of moving across the floor. She was very graceful, almost delicate. Petite but not skinny. Harry always admired her physical appearance. her bookwormness were used to the full extent to keep herself in shape using method she could only find in boring section of the libraries. Not to mention her being calm adn controlled person. Through all the years Harry had known Hermione , he had only seen her exploded 3 times, once to Ron, once when he slapped Draco malfoy, and the last one during the final battle.

He, on the other hand, he was a lanky yet strapping young man with dark coloring.A gangly tall Ron Weasley, towering almost 2 meter height. His red hair was combed back as best as it could be. However, strands did stream down in front of his blue eyes. He is a hot tempered guy who usually act first and think about it later on. Many of Ron adn Hermione fall out were caused by Ron's reckless act. But he repaid all that with expressive way of loving Hermione. Something Harry could never do for being an introvert man. Something he regretted for the result was so painful to him.

Ron seemed unconscious of that fact, however. The night Ron proposed Hermione in front of all the audience during Victory celebration he confidently asked Harry to be the best man. And Harry, being a loyal friend he was, accepted it. He cried himself to sleep that night in his room at Grimwauld Place.

At the moment Ron bent his head close to Hermione▓s ear and whispered something. When he pulled back, he was grinning a broad smile. Hermione▓s twinkling laughter was soon heard over the music, and, when she was turned to face Harry, he noted how her lips were spread elegantly into a gleeful smile. Harry felt the pinch of pain he▓d been ignoring all day grow tighter in the recess of his heart.

⌠Harry!■ a familiar voice called quietly to him. Harry turned to his right and saw one of his best friends, another Member of The Order, Neville Longbottom. Harry could tell his friend was happy for Ron; he was already celebrating, in fact. He held a glass of champagne uncannily delicately in one hand as he reached out to pat Harry on the shoulder with the other.

⌠Hey, Neville,■ Harry returned with a smile. They both turned to the dancing couple, who were just now finishing their first dance as man and wife.

⌠It▓s about time she gave in. She led him on a merry chase, that one,■ Neville remarked off-handedly. Turning his head, he gave Harry an impish grin, ⌠He▓ll never be bored, that▓s for sure!■

"Where is Ginny?" Harry asked back, " You two are usually inseparable." Neville and Ginny had maried soon after the war end. The first DA couple.  
Harry couldn't helped being thankful for Neville's crush on Ginny back then. it made him easier to say No When one night at his sixth year Ginny confessed. Harry always knew that Ginny was meant to be with Neville from the day he saw them swaying on de dance floor at the Yule Ball.

"You know her. Probably gossiping with Molly." Neville said.  
He suddenly got quiet for a while,his face become serious, then slowly, almost in a whisper he said, "Don't tell anybody yet, but we're planning to announce that Gi.." In a lightning flash Harry got the message.

Neville never dreamed that Harry could ever give him a bear hug. "Congratulations mate. I know both of you will be a good parents. So is it a boy?"

Quickly recovered, yet unable to hide his blush, Neville said, "Nope! A girl. Just confirmed by our mediwitch this afternoon. Guess i'll have to ask permission to the happy couple first, don't you think?" " You'd better, otherwise they would kill you for stealing their moment." "You right mate, i should.  
I think I'll go ask now," With a jubilant laugh, Neville set off for the wedded couple.

Shaking his head with reluctant pity, Harry turned away from the crowd and walked over to an empty table. He planted himself into an empty chair that faced the crowd and immediately sought out Hermione. Despite the thick horde, she was easy to spot.

Her eyes swerved in his direction and he immediately averted his gaze. He knew he▓d been caught staring, and his cheeks grew hot in response. She always managed to catch him when he least wanted her to.

To keep his mind busy he observed the fine linen tablecloth. He hadn▓t an idea where they had gotten it from, but it was a spectacular shade of chestnut brown. It was, no doubt, Ron▓s suggestion to have the color scheme be brown. While in Hogwarts, he couldn▓t stop ranting about the brilliant coloring of Hermione▓s eyes. After a while, brown became his favorite color. Though he▓d admit it now, he had been literally infatuated with the girl.

A smile grew on Harry▓s lips. Thinking about how carefree and young they once were was always bittersweet. He longed to escape back to those times, when they hadn▓t a care in the world. He wished that they could escape back to the nights when they▓d wander after hours and wreak havoc on Hogwarts. He wanted to relive the moment they hug together after winning a quidditch cup, especially after beating Slytherin, or perhaps chatting in Hogsmeade, just the three of us with Harry underneath his invisibility cloak during the third year. And not to mention, seeing a-turned-into-bouncing-ferret Draco malfoy at fourth year. He wanted the innocence back; he wanted it all back!

But the only thing that returned once the memories faded was the sense of responsibility. They were his best friends, for Merlin's sake. They had gone with him and sacrificed many things for him. It was supposed to be his task, and his task alone, to find all horcruxes, and to destroy them. Ron and Mione were not supposed to come along. But they went with him. They stood by him at the final confrontation against Voldemort. They had watched his back and made sure that no Death Eaters would be able to sneakily attack Harry. Only the trio were the living witnesses of the final figh that was the downfall of Lord Voldemort, and no one would tell the world about the detail for it was so horrible and traumatic. So, inspite of his broken heart when they announce their marriage day he promised himself that he will give what he can give for the sake of Ron and Hermione happiness.. even with the price of his heart. They deserved a little happiness.  
Harry sighed. if only she...

⌠Enjoying yourself, Harry?■ a teasing voice said softly.

Startled out of his thoughts, Harry swiftly turned his head to his left, and, immediately, he found it hard to breathe. Hermione Granger--Weasley! he amended with a curse--was, indeed, an entrancing sight. Dancing with Ron, her vivid beauty had been enhanced by his dark coloring. However, nothing compared to how she looked now. Up close, she was exquisite!

⌠Very much so, Weasley,■ he said, emphasizing the last word, with a slight grin. It hurt to say out loud, he admitted that silently to himself, but only repetition would ease the sting. At least, he hoped it would.

She let out a soft chuckle. ⌠It▓s so odd, isn▓t it? If someone would have told me one year ago that I would marry Ron, I think I would have thrown my Hogwarts: A History book at them.■

Harry raised a bemused eyebrow. ⌠Hermione Granger provoked to violence? And here I thought your marriage was something.■

⌠Well, maybe I wouldn▓t have thrown it, but I would have wanted to,■ she amended, a sheepish gleam entering her eyes.

⌠No doubt!■ Harry laughed. Quickly sobering, he glanced towards the empty chair next to him. Glancing back at her face, he said, ⌠Would you like to have a seat? It▓s been a while since we were last able to talk, and I▓m sure your feet must be aching from being the cordial bride.■

Giving Harry a sincere smile, Hermione glanced over her shoulder at her new husband. Harry instantly understood her concern, and the pinch became a firm grasp around his heart. Ignoring it, he added a pretended, yet convincing, note of jovialness to his voice as he said, ⌠Or would ol▓ Ron become overwhelmed with jealousy like in the good days?■

Hermione faced him again. The amused gleam in her eye that was sparked by his comment told Harry that she was recalling the days when Ron had suspected Harry of secretly trying to get Hermione for himself. If only Ron had known how right his assumptions were, they probably wouldn▓t be friends right now. If Harry had to pinpoint a time when he became exceptionally adept at guarding his emotions, he would say it had been during that year, his fifth year at Hogwarts. He half-regretted ever giving into the fear of losing Ron▓s friendship.

⌠No, I doubt he▓d become jealous. He finally got me to marry him, did he not?■ she said with a smile as she sat down next to him, adjusting her white skirts beneath her. Harry pulled out his wand and Accio-ed two glasses of champagne over to them. They landed softly on the table in front of them and he slipped his wand back into his jacket sleeve. ⌠Besides,■ Hermione continued, ⌠he▓s with Neville at the moment. You know how those two can be when they▓re together.■

Harry nodded as he took a sip from his glass, glancing at Ron. His friend was laughing at something Neville had said, probably some obscene comment. They were a pair, those two. Sometimes Harry felt slightly out of their loop since he tended to be a bit more serious, but he immediately pushed those emotions out of his mind. They were like brothers to him, and he them.

Glancing back at Hermione, he noticed the smile that was tenaciously sticking to her face. Whenever her eyes landed on Ron, her entire face lit up. She had a hard time keeping her attention off of her new husband, Harry noted as he watched Hermione absently bring the glass to her lips. The death-like grip on his heart tightened, and Harry had to fight the instinctive urge to rub his chest. Instead, he said, ⌠Marriage suits you.■

Her eyes instantly swiveled back to Harry, and amused smile flirting with her mouth. Slowly, she set her glass down as she said, ⌠I▓ve only been married for a couple of hours, so how can you tell?■

Harry shrugged. ⌠Just a feeling.■ Hermione▓s eyebrows fell into a confused frown, but he didn▓t pay attention to it. He returned his attention to Ron, who was currently accepting well wishes from Hermione▓s parents. Harry had never seen a more ecstatic man before. ⌠He looks happy,■ he thought out loud.

⌠He does,■ she remarked quietly. Something in her tone made Harry quickly glance back at her. She was staring at Harry, the confused expression still planted on her face. There was a question in her eyes, and he knew what she was asking, but he refused to answer. There was enough misery living in everyone already, and Harry didn▓t want to live while knowing he▓d only added more to this newly wedded woman▓s conscience.

⌠You look happy,■ he said sincerely.

⌠I am.■ Despite her confusion, she couldn▓t help the smile that crossed her features.

Noting the happy glow emanating from her flushed skin, he instantly knew that he had done the right thing in refusing to voice his emotions. Hermione and Ron were meant to be together, they truly did love each other. It may forever sting him, and his heart may never be complete again, but he▓d get used to living with the facts around him. Letting out a light chuckle, he commented, ⌠I never thought I▓d see this day.■

Something must have shown in his expression, however, for Hermione was no longer smiling. Her confused mask was back in place, and she looked concernedly at Harry. She set her half-empty glass away from her and folded her hands on top of the tablecloth. ⌠What about you, Harry?■ she asked quietly. ⌠Are you happy?■

For a second, he let the aloof facade fall away and exposed his internal pain. He wanted to tell her what was in his heart, wanted to get his anguish out in the open so he could begin the healing process! He didn▓t want to ruin the happy mood, though.

Shuttering his expression once more, he assured her, ⌠Why wouldn't I. You are my best friends. You've been through a lot and believe me you need all the happiness you can get. Even if i'm not, I will be.■ His voice was just as quiet as hers had been, and he was careful to make it void of the painful emotions he was feeling. ⌠I promise you that.■

That brief look into his unconcealed emotions had been enough for Hermione. Harry could see the sympathetic look in her eyes. He hated it; he didn▓t want her sympathy. He wanted her love, he wanted her, but that would never happen. He knew it; he only had to come to terms with that, and therein was the challenge.

⌠I▓m so sorry, Harry. I never intended--■ she started, but Harry refused to hear her out.

Harry reached out and grasped her hand. ⌠Don▓t try to explain, Mione. I understand.■ Giving it a firm squeeze, he continued, ⌠You can▓t control whom you love. Although I don▓t like it, I will accept it.■ Harry tried to remove his hand from her grasp, but she wouldn▓t allow him that freedom.

⌠I do love you, Harry,■ she stated emphatically, her hand now squeezing his. She leaned closer, her eyes shining with sincerity. ⌠I always have, you know, but just not in the same way I do Ron.■

⌠You don▓t owe me an explanation. I told you already, I understand.■ Faking a jovial smile, Harry patted her hand with his free one. When she failed to erase the concern from her brows, Harry leaned forward and said softly, ⌠Don▓t worry about me; I never dwell on what can▓t be changed. You and Ron make a fetching couple; I can tell you two love each other very much.■

Harry glanced at Ron and noticed that his attention was now on his wife. It wouldn▓t be long before he made his way over to her, and, despite his previous statement, he wasn▓t ready to see the loving couple prove the crowd how much in love they actually were. As much as he▓d like to talk to his good friend, Harry wasn▓t sure if he could actually stand it anymore. Harry had almost drained of his mental defence just being Ron's best man.. Wizard Gossip Channel would have a field day if they caught Harry bawled over Ron and hermione's wedding.

Hermione had also noticed her husband▓s scrutiny of her, Harry realized when he glanced back at her. She was returning Ron▓s gaze, a telling blush rising in her cheeks. He decided then that it was time to leave. Squeezing her hand to get her attention, which he did, he said conversely, ⌠Give Ron my best wishes for me, will you? I▓m afraid I can▓t stay; I have business to attend to. I▓m sure he▓ll understand.■

He stood and attempted to release his hand from her grasp. She was tenacious, this Hermione. When she refused to let go, he gently grabbed her wrist and pulled his hand free. Her hand dropped limply into her lap, and Harry almost regretted the incident. She looked almost beaten when she gazed up at him, and he wasn▓t sure how much more his heart could take.

He grabbed her shoulders and placed a light, friendly kiss upon her up-turned cheek. Pulling back, he said genuinely, ⌠Congratulations, Hermione Granger-Weasley.■ With a smile, he let go of her shoulders and turned to walk out of the glass door.

⌠Harry!■ Hermione called out from behind him. He turned and raised an eyebrow. She had stood, her hands raised and reaching out to him. Their eyes met and, once more, he let her know of his pain. Instantly, he saw his own pain reflected in her eyes. She knew that she had hurt him, and he knew that she hated being the cause of anyone▓s pain. There was nothing she could do about it, though, and they both realized that.

Dropping her hands, she clasped them in front of her. She let her head hang against her chest for a brief moment before bringing her eyes up to meet his, the pain that had once been there now gone. Then,bowing herself, she said, ⌠I . . . thank you.■

An understanding smile accompanied his words, as he said, ⌠Don▓t get too crazy on that honeymoon of yours. I▓ll see you soon.■ He turned, the smile falling from his face, and continued his journey out of the yard.

He walked a little ways into the night, not care about the sudden freezing cold athmosphere around him and snows fallen on his head and , it's nothing compared to what happen to his heart. After a few metres and his being covered by the darkness, he turned around once more. Ron had joined Hermione, much to his dismay. They were caught in a lover▓s embrace, and Harry▓s heart forgot to beat.

The death-like grip that had been provoking his heart all afternoon had finally managed to crush it. He could feel the now empty cavity like a sore tooth. His jaw clinched in an attempt to fight the tears invading his eyes. He had never allowed himself to cry over something so petty before, and he wasn▓t going to start now.

But it▓s not so petty, is it, Potter? he silently asked himself. No, it wasn▓t; his love for Hermione would never die. It had been a part of him for so long, he literally felt like he was losing a part of him. He had told Hermione the truth earlier when he flippantly mentioned that he had never thought to see this day. He had never imagined a day in his life when he would not be allowed to love Hermione. He wasn▓t sure if he was able to accept it yet.

With a soft pop!, he instantly disappeared into the night, ignoring the fact that he had allowed a single tear to drop from his cheek and fall into the snow beneath his feet. 


End file.
